The loner

She was her own person; after all she is a loner. The information that went inside her mind was what she allowed, even if negativity was the only information she allowed herself to absorb. There has been complaints about her life and now they were worsening because even she herself is begining to perceive they are existing and wonder about them. She is good at worrying, deep thinking and people’s complaints are sure as playing role in not giving her sleep.
It was not like she did not care about the migraine that ached like an earthquake in her head, dealing with it was useless because migraines were her daily bread. Very unhealthy but she is used to them. Worrying was bad as well but it had become her habit. She worried as if it was a job and she was getting paid from doing it. She did not even try to break the habit, no effort at all.
There was a day that shaken her atmosphere, although it did not end far. Her life was simply locking herself in her room or giving all the laugh she could do covet all pain when she is with friends. So nobody question her moves or her life as a whole. One of her friends decided to speak to her instead of complaining behind her back. The complaints were that she had a bad attitude and some of the things associated with that is her being rude and aggressive when she talk to others about what she does not like. She felt she talked normally. The friend also brought to her attention that she was good at telling other people to change their bad ways but she did not allow others to discipline her as well. Was it true? Was she like that?
No! It can’t be. She always shut herself in her room in order to avoid many things. So when was she rude or aggressive when talking to others? When did she think she knew better about others and refused to take advice from them. She will never know, she felt she was a normal person. She was just a loner, she spoke to no one about her problems. Maybe when she spoke to others she took her frustrations out on them and did not realise. She worried too much about things she could not control. She has been always alone in her dark days. She pushed everyone away by locking herself in her room. Maybe that friend of hers is right. Maybe those other friends are right as well. She will not know anyway, she continued to be a loner. She felt she was normal but others said she was rude, stubborn, aggressive, good at attending other people’s problems, unfriendly at times and taking small things too personal than it is necessary. Maybe they are all right. But the sad part was that she was not going to sleep that night. No, she is going to toss and turn on her bed trying to figure out what people mean and unfortunately as she wonder in pain, none of those friends will be there to help her. She was going to make a conclusion of her own and unfortunately it may keep adding to her bad attitude or whatever aggressive behaviour they were complaining about. She might never get to change.

see you in the next story.

From me to you,

Stay loving, stay loved. Stay blessing, stay blessed. God bless you all.


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